I was rejected by eHarmony and they couldn't find a match for me. Will I ever find love?
– Online Love Reject
Listen to my story about being rejected by eHarmony on the inaugural episode of the Dear Pastor podcast!
Online Love Reject,
First, let me reassure you that you are NOT a reject.
In fact, I was also rejected by eHarmony. They couldn't find a match for me and the algorithm wished me the best of luck. See the screenshot below:
Back in July 2016, before I had any inkling of getting married, I thought I would give one of the biggest online dating sites a try.
So, sipping on my iced soy chai latte from Starbucks, I filled out the eHarmony profile and hoped for the best.
I'm not sure what possessed me to try online dating that day. I thought I was going to be alone for the rest of my life. I had never tried speed dating, singles events, or anything like that. But I had a moment of bravery (or insanity) and decided to give it a shot.
Well, needless to say, based on the screenshot above, it didn't work out in my favor.
I broke eHarmony!
Just as well, since I was already the neighborhood cat lady anyway. Ask my siblings. They'll tell you!
But what I didn't know, was that two years later, in July 2018, I would reconnect with my future husband over something as simple as coffee.
Although we had been friends for over 20 years, we didn't know God's plans for us.
And that's the thing. We don't always know what God has planned for us. He just asks that we remain faithful.
People kept telling me there was no way I was going to be alone forever. I knew it was as tall order, but if there was going to be a change in relationship status, then it was going to definitely be the will of God.
Despite not knowing the plans God had for me specifically, I knew they were plans for me to prosper (Jeremiah 29:11) and not for harm. My only responsibility was to make sure that I become the best version of myself.
I didn't know I was being prepared for my future husband. I didn't know that the totality of my singleness was preparing me to be a better spouse.
Sure, when my husband and I were friends in college, we could have dated and could have gotten married. Would it have been the best relationship? It's hard to say. I know we've both matured exponentially and came into the marriage better able to communicate.
So, what's my point?
Be patient. Trust in the Lord.
Easier said than done, I know! Boy, do I know!
But I know the wait is worth it in the end. You are better off waiting for the one sent to you by God than forcing relationships to happen. Being single, especially around Valentine's Day, is something I'm all too familiar with.
Trust. Be faithful. Pray. Ask questions. But never give up! God is preparing you for something great!
“And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.” Romans 8:28